All about Jacks
On a day when I can’t think of anything to write about, I turn to my bookshelf and pull down a copy of Brewer’s Dictionary of Phrase and Fable for inspiration. As the cat, Jack, is sitting at my feet I decide to look that name/word up and see what Dr Brewer has to say about it. There are 49 entries and then 19 other side references. Deciding not to bore you with every single one (you can, after all, go and buy your own copy of this invaluable tome), I have picked out a few choice entries that might interest you and interspersed them with equally random images from my ‘to post’ collection.

For example, did you know that a Jack Adams was a fool? I didn’t, and there was no other explanation, so, like a fool, I Googled it and what came up first? ‘Jack Adams Underwear and active wear for men’ and a host of images of semi-clad men the likes of which not even the Grattan catalogue could run to. It’s also an annual hockey league award apparently, but mainly it’s about underwear. Moving on.

Jack-a-dandy (a foppish, bright little fellow – there are a few of them around here) was followed by Jack-a-Lent. The explanation for this is ‘a kind of Aunt Sally thrown at lent.’ So if you have an aunt Sally you now know what to do with her in the run up to next Easter. Apparently there is a reference to this in act III of The Merry Wives of Windsor. Next came Jack among the maids a ladies’ man (quite a few of them around here as well), and Jack-in-a-bottle, a long-tailed titmouse so called because of the shape of its nest. (I am more interested in how a mouse became to be called a tit, but that’s another story). Moving on.

Ah ha! There are plenty of these around the world right now too, a Jack-in-office, a ‘pompous overbearing official who uses his powers unimaginatively’ is how Dr Brewer politely puts it. I just call it Farage and have done.

Here’s my favourite so far, a Jack-in-the-green: ‘A youth who moves about concealed in a wooden framework covered with leaves and boughs as part of the chimney-sweep’s revels on May Day.’ Conjures up all sorts of odd images, mainly ones of military cadets getting up to no good in camouflage gear up chimneys. You may be either saddened or pleased to note that this custom is now obsolete. Oh look, a Jack of Dover is some unidentified ‘eatable’ mentioned by Chaucer in The Cook’s Tale – probably a pie that has been cooked more than once, apparently. Well, if you will eat at motorway service stations…

A couple more: Jack-o’-the-clock, is the carved/painted human figure that, in some old public clocks, used to (or still does) come out to strike the hours on the bell. I didn’t know that. There’s one at Wells Cathedral I am told, where two quarter-jacks strike the quarter-hours and Jack Blandfier strikes the hours. And finally, a Jack out of office – one dismissed or no longer in office which happily brings me back to Farage, though he’s not quite gone yet, he’s still taking EU money for telling it that it’s rubbish. There are a few Jack words I’ve not used that I could use in order to describe that particular dunty, bruss, buffle-head – as they would have said in Kent some time ago. I’ll leave the translation up to you.

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Pedi bay photos

The weekend was a bit of a productive one. Neil was working on his college course, and I was able to get ‘Remotely’; through the proofing process, almost, and now have it nearly ready to go live on Amazon. I just need to check the cover printing, which I should be able to do in the next few days. Watch this space. Meanwhile, I have also reached the end of the next book, ‘The Saddling’ in its first draft form. Just over 100,000 words that now need to be put in the right order and tidied up. But I will be leaving that alone for a while to let it ‘sink in’ before going back to draft two.

We also managed to have a very pleasant evening in Pedi, having dinner with lovely people (you know who you are), sitting on a balcony and watching the boats in the bay.

So, as my typing fingers are all but worn out, I think a few Pedi photos to welcome you to the week are in order, and I’ll leave the words for another time.

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How many steps must a man walk up?
I finally found time to get out of the house and head to Yialos to do the usual bank and business, get cat food for HRH Alarm Cat, check the post office and dash back up again before the final on-line meeting with the editor where we finished off the last edits for ‘Remotely.’ This was after watching a flotilla (or regatta) of boats leaving after spending a night in the harbour. I assume it was a race of some kind as there looked to be some marshal boats alongside them. A very pleasing sight to see, over 30 over-nighters heading off for a good day’s sailing.

Now then, people often ask how many steps there are up to the village and my reply usually is, it depends on which way you go. There are various ways to do it. The most straightforward is to head up past the Kalodoukas office, turn left after browsing Freddie’s shop and saying hello to Pet Corner, and then Carry On Up The Kali Strata – a good opportunity for a plug for the second ‘living on Symi’ book in the series. This way will give you roughly 360 + steps to take, with gentle slopes to break the journey, and some nice views.

You can also head to the bus stop and resist the temptation to take a taxi or bus and then head up the slope that way. Here you can turn off half way up or continue to the top and the high school, up the slope and then join the Kali Strata on the viewpoint corner. Or, you can start on route one and turn off opposite the large red house, turning right and taking the almost sheer set of steps to the zigzag which brings you out near Lemonitisa and the domed church you see from the harbour. Turn left there to find the village square or zigzag up some more to find the Castro.

You can also just take any of the right turns and steps as you climb up and see where you end up. I took the slope that doubles back about half way up the steps, between the two properties used for The Symi Gallery and then weaved my way up to our house from there. It saves going all the way around but although it’s only four levels from that slope, it’s still pretty sheer, and very good for the thighs. Whichever way you go, remember water and wear a hat if it’s really hot as there isn’t always shade. You’ll find the off-the-beaten-steps routes interesting as you never know what you will come across; ruins, views, chickens, cats, more chickens and the cockerel that goes of around four every morning and keeps going until well after seven. It’s an interesting walk whichever way you do it.

As for the number of steps involved in these routes, my advice would be not to count. You can’t feel your legs after 50 of them anyway so it doesn’t matter. And as for my weekend, well, the usual is planned; writing and chilling out as I watch the boats come and go and set about setting up the things needed to get ‘Remotely’ published, hopefully in a week or so’s time. Whatever you are doing, have a great weekend and I’ll see you back here bright and early on Monday.

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Symi Shakespeare
I came across an expression in Greek yesterday and typed it into the online translator. Πολύ κακό για το τίποτα, was the expression and it was being used by the chairman of the town council to describe something or other that was going on, on Symi, the other day. It translates as ‘much ado about nothing,’ and that put me in mind of other Shakespeare titles that could apply to our little island.

So, I went to my complete works, dragged it down from the shelf, put it down on the desk with a resounding thump and had a look at the list of plays.

It’s not a sparrow, it’s too big apparently…?

It strikes me that a trip to one of our supermarkets when news of fresh produce reaches us in the winter could also be much ado about nothing, and the sorting out of the country’s economic problems is currently a comedy of errors, if you are able to laugh at what’s going on. But a trip to Symi (a must for every traveller) will give you the chance to have your holiday just as you like it and, measure for measure, you will have a good time. Sitting out in a courtyard on a clear might in June, watching stars and listening to the owls overhead is definitely a midsummer night’s dream and by the twelth night of your holiday you will be fluent in the language of ouzo and relaxation, if you haven’t achieved that before. Obviously, if you journey here between December and March, and it’s possible, you will return home with a winter’s tale to tell though there may be a tempest or two to contend with during those months. You could take a walk and visit one of the island’s hamlets, the small farming communities out in the hills and whatever way you take your Symi holiday it will be a case of all’s well that ends well.

I could go all silly and suggest you might meet the merry wives of Horio and the two gentlemen of Nimborio, but that would be gilding the lily, as my uncle would have put it. Or, as Shakespeare himself may have put it – in fact he did: “If all the year were playing holidays; To sport would be as tedious as to work.”

Make of all this what you Will.

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Hungry birds and Symi weather
Wednesday had a bit of a late start to it thanks to a late night on Tuesday; great barbeque, lots of fun chat and good company. One of those nights where you forget about time, until you realise it’s well after midnight and you should have been in bed hours ago. Wednesday was also pretty humid here with a few clouds about, one of those sticky days where even the breeze felt damp.

But that didn’t stop people being out and about on the jet-skis at Nos beach, or in the water swimming. It didn’t stop the day boats from coming in or the visitors from enjoying time in the harbour, up in the village, making use of the many tavernas and bars we have here on Symi.

It was also day two of the final edit of ‘Remotely’ which took up two hours of my day. Another twenty chapters were finalised, leaving 11 to do on Friday. That means I can start the online publishing process through Amazon, as we can’t finally finalise the book until I have the ISBN number, which I can only get by starting the process online, something I should do today or tomorrow. Meanwhile I am still working my way through the next one (for next year) in its first draft form and finishing my scriptwriting course. I have one last assignment to do by the end of August: to write a screenplay. It has to be at least 15 pages long, and tell a complete story. I think mine is going to come out at an odd length for a film, but it is after all, only an exercise. Once that’s done and ‘Remotely’ is out, I shall have a lot more time to put into the next two books but, once ‘The Saddling’ first draft is finished, I might take a few weeks off from writing and have a bit of a break.

Perhaps I will get a chance to head to the beach one day, I may even dip a toe in the water, but let’s not be too hasty. People find it odd when I say I don’t go to the beach very much, but you have to remember we’re not here to be on holiday. We both work every day at some job or other and finding time off is not always easy. Mind you, I did have Wednesday morning off as I woke up three hours beyond my usual time, so the morning actually went past very quickly. But yes, a couple of mornings on the beach or on a long walk could be on the cards soon, as soon as we’ve got this book out and that one drafted, and the next one planned and the course finished… Upwards and onwards.

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